just a glimpse of my heart

It’s not rocket science. If someone helps you out or blesses you, then thank them. Send them a card. Buy them flowers. Get them a small token of appreciation.I send out thank you cards all the time. Every single time I get that email for a free gift from shutterfly, I am going to choose the free thank you cards. I will use them. 😀 We have so many people that pour into our lives and support our ministry. I want to make sure that they know how much they are appreciated. 
I don’t want to take people for granted. I don’t want people to feel burned out or exhausted because of me. I would much rather them feel purpose, passion, and an excitement that keeps them going even when they are tired. I have found that a little appreciation goes a long way. 
I am raising our kids this way as well. I make our kids write thank you cards. Not only for gifts, but for invites over to friends homes and things like that too.
I have always felt like a hand written thank you card often means so much more ( I also tend to think that it is quite classy). 
So, who is a blessing in your life? Who deserves a thank you? Shame on all of us for getting in a place where we feel like such things are deserved instead of appreciating them. Be careful- some people are raising a generation that feels entitled for everything and appreciates nothing. 
I recently told Allie that if there was something in her life that she would miss if it wasn’t done, then that person deserves a thank you. Also, if you would know who to complain to when you feel like something is not done right….then you should also appreciate that person when the job is done properly.
We try to show our appreciation to the leaders that help us in ministry as well. They are sacrificing their personal time, family time, energy, and finances to pour into a generation along side us. Don’t keep asking more and more of those helping you without taking the time to pour back into them.
A small act of appreciation does not take long at all, but it can have a lasting impact on your relationships, family, and ministry. 

I have always loved Charleston. I love living here and am blessed that Otis feels the same way. Our city is beautiful and rich in history. We cannot fathom the people that constantly talk about not being able to wait to get out. I have lived here my entire life and would be perfectly happy to spend the rest of my life here.

This week has been quite a week to be in charleston. We have been all over the news and faced great tragedy. It’s heartbreaking when these acts of hate and destruction happen in our country, but it is a whole new level when it happens down the street from your home. 

I did not personally know any of the victims, but I know people that did. I have driven right by that church thousands of times. The fact that it happened in a church also struck me in a personal way. It could’ve been any of us. 

This terribly shooting has catapulted charleston into the media and all eyes were on us. I’m amazed at the outcome. 

I felt the heartbreak and fear as news of this event broke last Wednesday night. I felt anxiety when my husband talked about going downtown (I was unsure how tense the scene might be, because at that point in time they had not captured the shooter) and felt a sense of victory as it was announced that he had been captured. I had tears in my eyes as I watched the bond hearing. I listened as families told the killer that they forgave them. It gave me goosebumps. They told him that Christ could help him and change his life. Wow. 

I have watched firsthand as our amazing city has taken a stand united. Many amazing things have happened here. Seeing thousands  of pictures fill IG from the human bridge of unity that happened on the Arthur Ravenel Bridge with the hashtag #charlestonstrong filled me with pride. To see the news reports of people standing together and hear national news sources point out that there was no rioting or looting here… draws us even closer as a city. There have been prayer circles and worship services in the middle of Marian Square. 

We have not been perfect. There have been a few instances of vandalism and picketing, but it has been nothing compared to the scene in other parts of the country when acts of violence have occurred.  A common thing that keeps happening here is singing. There have been multiple times that hateful speech has been yelled and crowds of supporters have just started singing hymns to drown out the negativity. Love truly does drown out hate.

Otis went downtown with a friend the night after this happened and spent an hour or so praying with people. No doubt people are hurting. Standing together is providing strength for our city, versus tearing it down with more violence. 

I took the kids down to the church this past Monday so that we could all see it with our own eyes. I explained to them that this was on the national news. They know what’s been going on. They’ve asked questions and we’ve answered. We were unsure how much Gary was hearing or paying attention to, until this conversation in the car….

Me- Gary, do you know what happened?

Gary- yep, nine people got shot at a church.

Me- yes, that’s right. They captured the bad guy and he is in jail now. 

( I didn’t want him to fear going to church)

Gary- yep….. I heard you and daddy say that. 

Me- ok good, so what do you think should happen now?

Gary- oh, we should definitely pray!
As our city is preparing for funerals of the nine victims, warnings are circulating that groups are coming to picket the services with hate filled messages. Once again our city is rallying together to drown out the negativity with love. Charlestonians have organized a human wall to block the families trying to grieve from the messages of hate.

I’m thankful for charleston. 

The church that we attend and serve in is extremely multicultural. I have heard many people and guest speakers comment on how uncommon it is to see a church that is as diverse as ours. The Sunday after this tragedy, we held hands across the sanctuary and prayed. We prayed for each other, our city, and the Emmanuel AME church. I looked around during that prayer and was once again filled with pride. To see all different races and cultures united in prayer and love…..

So very proud and grateful to be #CharlestonStrong

We have officially gone from a two cell phone family to a three cell phone family!

Here’s my confession –I absolutely LOVE it!

We told Allie that she would get a phone when she joined youth (6th grade). When students come to youth the majority of them have phones and we use text and social media to send them reminders and news. So that was the deal.
She was waiting…not patiently…but she was waiting….
…..mentioning how she couldn’t wait to have her own phone.
…..bargaining with us to get it for her right when she finished fifth grade instead of the end of the summer when she would be technically starting sixth.

And we caved. We went ahead and surprised her with it after she spent a weekend away at a church event. I promise she had tears in her eyes.

We explained to her that never would I have ever imagined being 11 years old and having an iphone. We told her that her chores were now to be treated like a job—like a for real job! We hold her chores to a much higher standard and have stressed to her that we no longer have to remind her to do her chores. It’s her job. If she wants that phone, she has to earn it. She has lost it as punishment one time in the month or so that she has had it, but it showed her that we were serious.

She loves having a phone. We have pretty high parental control settings, so she cannot access the internet (except for chosen sites- Disney, Discovery kids, national geographic, you know- the good stuff). That is her only complaint….and we are not caving on that.

She has gone out-of-town with her daddy since she got her own phone. I loved getting texts and picture from her the whole time.
I just love having access to her and knowing that she has access to me!

She is a good kid and has stepped up and handled this new responsibility beautifully!

This was the first picture that she ever sent me the day after getting her phone-

she captioned it- “rocking out to t swift”

Gosh, I love that girl!

I recieved a text a few months ago asking me if I could take a few pictures of my cousin to serve as his senior pictures. Our family loves Cody and his family. Cody was our ringbearer when we were married 14 years ago. It was my privilege to be able to take this pictures for him. We met downtown one Saturday morning. Being a typical teen guy, Cody was late…..and then informed me that he had to be at work in like two and a half hours. Plus he had to go home and shower/change for work first….and he also wanted time to stop and get food! haha! We ran around like a couple of crazies snapping about 400 pics in our limited time. We did not get to visit all of the spots that I had planned, but I was happy with how they came out and I believe that his mom was too! 🙂 Congrats Cody!!

and of course, there were a few shots that showed Cody’s goofy personality 🙂 –

The. Family. Calendar.

It might be the command center of your home. For our family, it is. Well, for me it is! I have found this year that I like having calendar pages printed out instead of a traditional flip calendar. I like to be able to glance ahead and see the coming months. If your calendar is like ours, there are probably some days that you have more activities then you do space to write them. There are days, weeks, and months that our calendar looks like a chaotic mess. It can be overflowing with family commitments, birthdays, youth events, meetings, doctor appointments, field trips, athletic games/practices, and vet/groomer visits. Life is busy. I get it. I know it’s not just me. I rely on our calendar a lot. I am a “list” person and I will make myself notes as I am out to make sure that things get written on our calendar. I often look at it first thing in the morning and usually in the evening as well. I want to make sure that we don’t miss anything that is important…

That being said, how much blank space is on my calendar? Not a whole lot.

Maybe you think to yourself that you don’t have to pencil in certain things. Why in the world would you need to write in your schedule spending time with your spouse or kids? That stuff just happens. I am blessed to spend a lot of time with my kids. We home school and we get to eat lunch together every single day. When times do get busy, they are right there with us- running the errands and getting things done. That doesn’t mean that I am satisfied and that I don’t desire more time with them. I feel like I don’t get a lot of relax time with them. They have asked for family movie nights. That’s kind of hard when mommy works at night. We received a fun Disney themed game for Christmas. They have played it with each other. Do you know how many times I have played this game with them? NOT ONCE. Of course, I plan on making up for some of these things during our summer break.
Realistically, if I am not intentional with how I choose to spend my time….life has a tendency to pass on by.

I talked a couple of weeks ago to our youth group about making time for God. I used the athletes as examples. During any given week, these high school and college students can devote 10-15 hours per week to their sport. They are disciplined, because if they skip out it will affect their performance. I asked how many of them, if their coach just left it up to them to devote that much time per week on their own and didn’t have set practices scheduled, would actually put in that much time. I was told tests and projects and family time and work would probably get in the way. Life can get busy and get in the way. It is important to actually schedule what we value and what needs to get done.

How does this concept apply to our time with God as well?

It’s easy to get swept away in routine. I’m in church on Sunday and Wednesday. Does it really matter if I don’t necessarily spend time every day with God? It does. Just like the athletes, it can affect your performance in life.
Be intentional with your time. Leave some blank space on purpose. Guard that blank space for family time. Make the choice to schedule more time with God– personal time and time to listen for His voice.
This is not always easy. One girl in youth…well, we figured out her commitments and subtracted everything from the time in one week. She was left in the negative. Some of us are like that. We might have to trim things in some areas to make room for what is most important. This is where the ‘being intentional’ comes in. The time is going to pass either way.
Matthew 6:21- For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

This past weekend we held our own ceremony to honor our kids and their achievements this home school year. We realized right before Thanksgiving that this would be a big year for our kids if they were in traditional school. Gary would be graduating from K-5 and Allie would be having a promotion ceremony for finishing elementary school. So, of course, that meant that we were going to have some sort of event to honor them. We decided three years ago when we started homeschooling that we were going to do it right! We don’t just follow the base curriculum. We have added extra literature assignments and book reports. We always try to go on several field trips per year and add other learning opportunities, such as sign language, typing or library skills. We don’t ever want our kids to miss out on memories…to look back and think that they never had some experience. They were just as excited for this event as I was.

Well, if you know me that I like to go all out. I want things to look nice, coordinated and organized. I usually plan menus and research decorations ideas for months for birthday parties and events like that. I’ve spent months going through ideas for this ceremony. I was VERY happy with how it turned out and we received lots of compliments about how people could tell that we really put time into it. That makes me happy.

One of the first things I ordered was a cap and gown for Gary. He was so cute! I am so glad that I went ahead and got him one, instead of just having him dress up. We ordered them nice invitations and mailed them out to a handful of close family and friends. We are so blessed with such an amazing group of people in our church that pour into our kids lives consistently. They stand in as aunts and uncles and just love them. We ended up with about 20 people in attendance and it was perfect.

I made little programs to put on the chairs. We chose to give ourself a mascot not long after we got Jasper. It is so fitting that we would be “home of the huskies”.

I LOVE scrolling through pinterest and different blogs and finding cute ideas for parties. We decided to keep the food simple and just serve snack type/ light refreshments.

I love having the fruit in individual cups. We have all seen people pick out the strawberries or pineapple of the big bowl!! This is going to be the only way I serve fruit to larger crowds from now on!!!

We had the kids waiting in a hallway before the ceremony so that they could make an entrance.

Allie came out first….

and then Gary….

I went to a local teacher’s supply store for the first time and bought them ribbons and certificates. I did print a few off online, but for the most part I was happy with the ones that I purchased. We took the time to recognize each students accomplishments and strengths for the year. They each had to come up and shake their Daddy’s hand to get the awards.

Allie had worked the last month or so on a book report that summarized the year. It also highlighted how she felt about home school and how much she enjoyed sleeping in and our occasional pajama days. She presented this report at our ceremony.

and the proud parents watched from the back-

Next we actually gave the kids their diplomas and announced them as officially promoted 🙂

I thought that our ceremony was concluded and that Otis was going to thank everyone for coming and for being such a vital part in our family. Instead, he had flowers for the kids to give me. He honored me for the time and work that I put in. Oh gosh…melt my heart….the tears were forming….

We had such a fabulous celebration with everyone. It turned out to be such a special night for our kids…really, our entire family. Everyone stayed longer than I thought they would, which showed me that they were enjoying themselves. I couldn’t have been happier with how it turned out.

I am writing this as I sit at the laundromat. The kids are with Otis, so I am sitting here alone. Well, there are three other older ladies here gossiping, reading the paper, and folding  away. Our dryer has been broken for about three weeks now I guess. Our first thought was to fix it. It has proven to be “unfixable”. So, I start checking out dryers online. As I am looking at prices and models, I remember one of the items on my house project list. It involves making over the current laundry/ storage room. In order to go along with my vision, we would have to buy one of those stackable washer/dryer sets. 

We just bought a new washing machine. A nice one. Like less than a year ago. <sigh>

Is coming to the laundromat a joy? Far from it. Is it bearable? Yes. Honestly, it’s kind of freeing. Laundry seems to consume me. All the time. SERIOUSLY, IT IS NEVER DONE. However, in the few weeks that we have been washing our clothes at home and making the twice a week trip to the laundromat for the dryers…..it has been kinda nice. Those other five days of the week are laundry free. We wash like crazy about five loads in the morning and go to the laundromat and use the turbo dryers. Everything is dry in about 25 minutes. BAM. It’s done. It condenses that chore into twice a week. Something’s not washed….deal with it. 

So, I face the question of buying a new dryer to use now or continue coming to the laundromat for a month or two while we save for the stackable unit. 

If I did buy a new dryer, would my goal for the laundry room be top priority or just something else on the honey do list?

See if I hold off and deal with the slight inconvenience temporarily, then my goal might be closer than I think. That project will stay top priority in our house. I could be enjoying my Pinterest inspired room makeover before the summers end! 😃 

It makes me think about life. We want what is easiest. We want what is most convenient. I’m not trying to turn a broken dryer into this big dramatic life lesson, but hey…if it works. 

Some times the plan  and purpose that God has for us, requires a little extra work.Maybe Some   inconvenience. If we are willing to stick with it, then the end result can be our dream come true. There is nothing like knowing that you are walking in the will of God completely. You might think that’s Gods purpose for your life is years away….but He has a perfect purpose for you right now. Whatever season of life you are walking in, He knows. He might be trying to make your dreams come true, but you’re too busy trying to take the easy way out. Don’t cheat yourself like that. Be willing to do some extra work for the amazing end result. 

I think I’m gonna hold out for my dream room! 

A year ago today, I had spent a lovely Mother’s Day with my family. I was about half way to work and my phone rang with Otis’ ringtone. When I answered my phone, I heard the unfamiliar voice of a lady. She was calling to tell me that she was standing with my daughter…..that my family had been in a wreck and that my husband was over with my son… and that the paramedics were working on him.

Talk about SCARY.

I turned my car around so fast. I made that trip back to Johns Island in record time. The kind stranger tried to assure me that she was sure he would be ok. She told me that they had stopped the bleeding and that there was so much traffic from the accident that I probably wouldn’t even be able to get through. She said that she wasn’t sure if there was any point in me even trying to come. Hello? I haven’t even talked to my husband yet and you’re telling me that paramedics are “working” on my son. I thanked her for calling me and standing with my scared Allie and then I assured her that I would find a way to get through, not to worry about that.

It was a pretty bad accident. A driver crossed the yellow line into Otis’ lane. To avoid a head on collision, he turned into a ditch and the truck ended up becoming airborne. The other driver still hit him and went on to also hit the car behind him.

It’s humbling how moments like this can happen in a flash. You are never prepared. Everything can change in one single instance.

I still get a knot in my stomach thinking about that day. If my mind wanders to that idea of what could have been…

I could have lost my entire family that day.

I am FOREVER grateful for God’s hand of protection on them and His mercy that day.

Psalm 121:7- The Lord will keep you from all harm— He will watch over your life…

Thank you Jesus for holding my family in the palm of Your hand on that day and always!

It happened just this week. It was my night off, so I was home. I hadn’t been asleep for longer than an hour. I heard  a scream. It’s Gary, our 6 year old. He’s screaming, “MOMMMMMYYYY!!!!”  And as a mom, you can tell the difference in the sound of your kids cries. This was a ‘for real, I need you now’ kinda scream. I jump out of bed and go to his room. He is sitting on his bed….in the dark…..just crying out for me. He said he had a nightmare and wanted to come get in mommy and daddy’s bed. I step over Legos and stuffed animals to hug him and calm him down. Then I walk him by the hand into our room where he climbs into bed with us. 

This time last week, we had just finished up a weekend long youth event called Love God, Serve. It was the first time that we had done this event. In the past, we have always done two weekend long events per year. The Stand which is a major focus of ours and then we had done something called servolution. When we were planning out the youth calendar for this year, we talked, prayed, and decided that it would be amazing to turn “serving others” into a year long focus…not just a theme for one or two events.
My favorite thing about Love God, Serve was that it was not just our group. This was a group of youth pastor’s (including Otis) from our community that did the planning for this. The event included an opening rally with glow worship on friday night, service time during the day on saturday and a cookout with inflatables followed by a closing rally on saturday. Our group came back and stayed the night and ended the event after church service on Sunday. If I remember correctly, this event spanned seven youth groups and four denominations. That is an awesome thing!! Why do we spend so much time comparing and trying to outdo one another when we all have the same end goal anyway!?!? It was super exciting to me to see the room filled that saturday night and know that Charleston was blessed in so many ways on that Saturday afternoon.
Our group went to The Lowcountry Food Bank. It was my first time there. What a massive operation!! The work that they had for us was certainly not glamorous. In fact, some of the things were straight up gross. I didn’t hear one of our teenagers complain. They worked hard amd got a 3 hour job done in half of the time. I walked around and took pictures a lot, so I was moving from table to table. We usually have an pretty great group that is willing to do whatever needs to be done. However, there is also usually one or two students that couldn’t care less that we have to watch and stay ont op of what they are doing. This time was different. Everyone was working. Everyone was doing. I am as always so proud of them. They are a great group of students!
Some of the other groups were ministering to different people all over our community. There were groups doing yard work in neighborhoods. There was a group building a ramp for an elderly person. Numerous groups went to different nursing homes- to help out inside and outside. These are just the few examples that I can remember off the top of my head.
Don’t you dare write off teenagers because they look/dress/act different than you. They are full of passion. They are an army…a force to be reckoned with.
It is true that one single person can make an impact, but wow, when we work together…the ripple of that can be phenomenal!