Weak Spots

What does that title mean to you? How would you define a weak spot?

I remember one day, we had a leak in our attic. The water was leaking and caused there to be a weak spot in our ceiling. When you looked at it, it looked almost the same as the rest of the ceiling. You couldn’t necessarily tell that it was a weak spot. You might have that suspicion, but nothing was absolute. Then my husband reached up and touched the weak spot…. his fingers went right through!! The area in our ceiling was so weak that the slightest bit of touch – not even necessarily pressure, but just the slightest touch- caused breakage.

I can relate to that hope in my ceiling quite a bit lately.

The enemy knows all about us. He is, after all a master deceiver. He knows what buttons to push to hurt us. He knows our fears.

If you have known me long or ever heard my testimony, then you know that I had quite an unhealthy relationship with my mother. One thing that I have always believed is that if you aren’t being a role model for someone to look up to, then you are probably giving them an example of what not to do. That is how I always felt- that I would never be like her. Having said that, motherhood has always been a dream of mine. I never had a vision of a certain career when I was in high school. All I knew was that I wanted a family. I wanted to be that mom that was driving the kids around and had snacks packed and great birthday parties.

I am so grateful for my two amazing children. I love them with my whole heart. I pray over them and can literally start crying by just thinking about how fabulous they are. When the Lord told me to leave my full time job, I was stepping into a realm that I had never known… being a stay at home mom. I am so thankful for this time in my life. Having the opportunity to spend every day with them and teach them, will always be the greatest honor of my life.

These times haven’t exactly been easy though.

We have faced death and drama in our extended family. We have faced the financial stresses of being a one income family. We have faced the challenges of having a teenager. We have faced the challenges of homeschooling.

We have faced them and by God’s grace we have made it through so far, but not perfectly. Some days are just plain hard. I’m not super proud to say that there has been moments of lost tempers and arguing.

Every time I lose my temper, do you know what I hear? I hear the enemy whispering in my ear “you’re just like her” or “what if your kids aren’t speaking to you in twenty years either?”

The devil knows my weak spot. It’s this family of mine. The people that you love the most are the ones that can drive you the craziest! Fussing at my kids for not doing their chores is not me being a bad mom! I have to remind myself that. Believe me, no family is perfect…. but I know that we love each other and are there for each other no matter what. I know that my family is nothing like the situation that I grew up in. I know that, but lies whispered can cause moments of high emotion.

This might all sound crazy to you. It makes perfect sense to me. You might think I’m a great mom or a awful mom or a mediocre mom…. either way, I have to rely on God’s Grace daily. EVERY. SINGLE.DAY.

My weak spot might not be the same as your weak spot. We all have to be aware of our weaknesses so that we can be ready for the attack.

Recognize lies for what they are- LIES. Don’t let them in. Be ready. And by all means, allow yourself some grace. There is plenty to go around!!

About jfulford01

Hello to anyone taking time form their busy lives to read my blog. I am a wife to an amazing man, who I am blessed to serve alongside in youth ministry. I am mommy to two amazing kids who I am privileged to be able to homeschool. This blog is out of my comfort zone and certainly me trying to be obedient to Christ. I love Him more than I care about my own comfort or awkwardness. Hopefully, this blog is honest, real, and transparent. I'm not a big fan of fake. The Lord is using it to bring growth to me...and I pray that in the process something about my crazy beautiful life might also encourage others.
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