Transparency- How do you see me now?

Social Media is such a huge part of society today. The people that are not on facebook, twitter, or instagram are few and far between. This way of life can be used as such a great tool for ministry and way of keeping in touch. It can also be a terrible source of stress and sadness. It’s called the comparison game. Ever heard that saying that talks about not comparing your life with your friends on facebook, because it is like comparing your outtakes to their highlight reel? It can be so true.

Now please read these next few sentences and know that I am not trying to build myself up….but this is an important part to the point of this post. I am a wife, mother, homeschool teacher, full time employee, and youth pastors wife. I love the study of women being like spaghetti and men being like waffles. It fits myself and my husband perfectly. I am usually going 100 MPH in several different directions all the time. I work in the evenings until early morning. I come home and sleep for a bit….then it is school time and then nap time…..then chore time…..then dinner time…..then work time again. I do whatever I can to help my husband with ministry in any spare moment I have. Sometimes I absolutely hate my schedule. For the most part, I try not to complain. God lined this all up. I was moved to these hours only months before Otis was hired full time at our church. If I was working the day shift, then I would not be free on the weekends or during the day to help him.  Also when we came to the point of making a decision regarding our kids and school, if I was working during the day…I don’t know what we would’ve have done. I can see where it was all being lined up perfectly when I had no idea what was coming our way. I also have quite a love for pinterest. I love planning parties and coming up with all these cute decorations and table settings. I tend to go big with our kids birthday parties. They have to choose their theme- usually by thanksgiving so that I can start my research. Yep, I’m that mom. I don’t apologize for having big birthday parties. Otis and I are both December babies and ask anyone born in December and they will confirm that as a child they were usually robbed of the birthday experience because Christmas was so close. My family always had at least a cake for me. I can only remember one birthday party and can recall getting Christmas ornaments and decorations as my presents from aunts/uncles. Otis never had birthday parties. It was something that we decided long before we ever had kids, that we would always make birthdays a big deal.   I have been called ‘supermom’ and have friends and family say stuff to me all the time like ‘ I don’t know how you do it all’. I just usually laugh those comments off.

I try and have dinner ready when Otis gets home from the office- about 4:30. We have a small window of time to chat and have dinner together as a family. Then we have a few minutes to clean up and I have to leave for work around 6. Most days, Otis comes in the back door and I am standing in the kitchen finishing up whatever we are having that night.

Then there are the other days….. days that as soon as cracks open the door, I’m sure he sees a wave of relief across my face. When dinner is not ready. When my oily hair is thrown in a ponytail and I am probably still in my pajama pants. Those days when the kids are fighting and the house is a mess. Those days when I feel like a failure as a homeschool mom. Those days when the laundry is piled up- probably all over my couch to be folded and put away, Those days when the house is a mess and the dishes are piled in the sink. Those days when I feel like I have gotten nothing accomplished. Those days that if you showed up at my house unexpected, then I would meet you in the yard and chat there, because No way would you be coming in. Those days when my to do list is a mile long and I didn’t get to mark off a single item. Those days when it seems to be just about survival- just making it through the day.

Please don’t ever look at me and think that I have it all together- I don’t think that anyone really does. We all have our days. Don’t compare your outtakes to my highlight reel, because just like the paragraph above- I have lots of those days too. If you are posting things to social media to brag on yourself or to make others feel  belittled, then shame on you. We are called to build one another up. yes, I post about our kids and our youth, I post about my husband. I post about their accomplishments. Romans 13:7 talks about giving honor to whom honor is due. There is nothing wrong with that. Proverbs 27:2 also tell us to ‘let someone else praise you, and not your own mouth…’ So if someone is a blessing to you, let them know….send a card or text….don’t take that for granted. Encourage them for being that blessing. 

We like for people to see the ‘Sunday morning’ us- the version that is all put together and ready to face the world.  That’s fine to some extent. Believe me, I like to have everything together. We can’t use that to put others down. Time to examine our motives.

“Therefore encourage one another and build one another up…” 1 Thessalonions 5:11

There are enough things in society that can break you down and make you fell less than worthy…..make an extra effort to be real with people… offer a little transparency… and a lot of grace.

About jfulford01

Hello to anyone taking time form their busy lives to read my blog. I am a wife to an amazing man, who I am blessed to serve alongside in youth ministry. I am mommy to two amazing kids who I am privileged to be able to homeschool. This blog is out of my comfort zone and certainly me trying to be obedient to Christ. I love Him more than I care about my own comfort or awkwardness. Hopefully, this blog is honest, real, and transparent. I'm not a big fan of fake. The Lord is using it to bring growth to me...and I pray that in the process something about my crazy beautiful life might also encourage others.
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